You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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