So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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