So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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