i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Idk if I want to put a bra on
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
