careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I think i got beer on your cat.
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