you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
