Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
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