The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
