real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
