the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
send nudes
from the living room?
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
