haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize