Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
