Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Barsexuality is the new black.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Randomize
