carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
