I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
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