Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
