she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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