Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
