Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
