What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
