Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
