Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
