But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
