Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
