We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
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