just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
