he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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