I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Randomize