They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Randomize
