She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
