No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
