how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Randomize
