Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
