When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
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