We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
