So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize