All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
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