I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
COCAINE IS GR8
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize