just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
