did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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