operation have a gay friend backfired
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
this will be a night to untag.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
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