Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
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