dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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