5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Randomize
