You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
How does it feel to date your dad?
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