You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
