just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
