I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
40s are totally the cure
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
