Do you still have your period?
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
