My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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